February is the month of love. It’s all around us. Hearts have become synonymous with love. Just like there are different ways to love and express that love, there are different types of love. Let’s explore them.
According to ancient Greeks, there are seven types of love:
- Eros (erotic love) – Named after the Greek god of love and fertility, Eros refers to sexual or passionate love. In Greek mythology, it is believed that cupid’s arrows bring on a form of madness as we “fall” in love after being pierced by the arrow.
- Philia (affectionate love) – Philia is used to describe the love between equals or friends. Plato believed physical attraction was not a requirement of love, and therefore used philia to refer to love between friends. It can be the platonic love, without attraction, or strengthen the bonds between lovers.
- Storge (familial love) – Storge is a kind of Philia used to describe the love between family or close loved ones born out of familiarity. Most commonly used to describe the bonds between parents and children, siblings, or friends who we have known forever.
- Agape (selfless love) – This is the highest form of love. It is a selfless, unconditional, universal love. It is not influenced by any selfish need or primal desire like some other forms of love. It’s the type of love we feel for strangers (like the kids at Hope for Hearts).
- Ludus (playful love) – Playful love, or Ludus, refers to uncommitted love. It is akin to the love we feel when we first meet a potential suitor and begin to fall in love. In the early stages of love (flirting, teasing, dancing, seducing, etc.) we are still uncommitted. It works best when both parties stay this way, but if one advances to another stage of love, conflict can arise.
- Pragma (practical love) – Pragmatic love is based on reason or sense of duty to longer-term interests. Other types of love take a back seat to pragmatic love. It is more common in arranged marriages, celebrity relationships, or political pairings.
- Philautia (self-love) – Philautia comes in two forms – healthy or unhealthy. The unhealthy version is akin to hubris, believing yourself to be above everyone else, the gods, etc. Healthy self-love is more like making sure you are whole and healthy before you can help others (such as the old metaphor of putting the oxygen mask on yourself before your neighbor on a plane).
While Valentine’s Day may focus on Eros, Philia, or Ludus, I challenge you to take some time for yourself this month and examine the other types of love in your life. Are you taking care of yourself, keeping your heart and soul healthy? Think about your love for your family and how you can strengthen it. Do you have any pragmatic relationships that need attention? Do you have any relationships based on the Agape, selfless type of love?
When you make a donation to Hope for Hearts, it is one of the highest forms of Agape you can ever show. You’re committing a selfless act of giving to a stranger who you will never know. It is an unconditional act, forgiving of any past transgressions and with only the hope that they will turn their life around and lift themselves from poverty to prosperity.
So tell me, who do you love?
With love,
Cristen
